pagibig?

REALITY BITES, YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT. EVEN IT’S THE OPPOSITE OF HOW YOU WANT THINGS TO HAPPEN. So, I’ll deal with it every time reality bites me? Pfff.

Do you use, FUCK? DAMN? SHIT? Or CRAP? I use crap. I use it all the time. I use fuck too, it’s worse compared to crap but when you combine it—haha it results into something FINER.

“FUCK. You’re such a crap.” See? It’s more beautiful? I can say it over and over and over. What is crap? Is it a verb? A Noun? An Adjective? What is it? It’s an adjective (on my dictionary). Let’s rephrase it.

“FUCK. You’re such a U-S-E-R.” Crap means anything you want to compare to the person you’re talking to.

Why am I like this? The most logical answer to that question is. “I’M MAD.” Some will say I’m bitter, but the question is… WHO IS NOT? Being bitter is already a universal feeling, it’s mutual. It’s a must a have, it’s in. You’re bitter to your friend, to your classmate and to someone you don’t even know. It’s doesn’t require anything. It just happens.

AT FIRST, I GOT JEALOUS BUT THEN I REALIZED SHE’S UGLY. –this line is full of bitterness. Do you agree? This is the line that started everything that’s attached to me now.
LOVE, the root of all evil. You don’t say mean things to someone just because you feel like saying it. It’s because you lost what you had. Or you lost what you WERE going to have.

I LOST MY GAME. Falling in-love is a game, you risk what you have. Then It’s either you’ll WIN or LOSE. Winning, everybody deserves to win; WHO DOESN’T? But still, we lose. I hate losing, and I know you hate losing too. Why do we have to lose, if we have the best interests at heart? Why does it have to end like this; an ending that no one deserves. I can see myself loving him with all my heart, and I know I will. Why didn’t he pick me? And he left me hanging by a thread instead? Was I too good for him? I wish that’s the reason why I’m feeling like this. I hope God knows what he’s doing. I’m hurt, so hurt. Why do we meet someone not deserving, why can’t we meet the deserving one instead? Do we have to go undergo a test just to know the good one from the rest? Hindi ba pwedeng tayo nalang ang mamili at gumawa siya ng paraan to make things work? Hindi ba pwedeng ganon nalang?

"YOU CAN’T MAKE EVERYONE LOVE YOU, BUT YOU CAN MAKE THEM FEAR YOU.” Because of this line my life’s crap.

i'll just STOP.

I’m typing this note…but I’m not in-love. I’m just ADDICTED TO LOVE.

How can you tell when you’re already in-love? Is it by the butterflies you have inside you? How do you love a person? Is it by the way he walks? Or by the way he fills your day with surprises? Is it by the way she speaks? Or the way she turns a bad day into a day you’ll never forget?

Do you encounter these questions; Is he in-love with me? Is she feeling the same way?

I woke up this morning feeling sore. I didn’t know what to do. I kept on staring at the floorings of my room. After a few minutes my phone vibrated. I had 5 missed calls and 7 messages. I turned it off; I didn’t want to start my day bad. I was receiving missed calls and messages from someone I detest. He’s a stalker, yes…a STALKER. Still, I was lying on my bed and haven’t changed my position. I just moved my right arm a bit and left it hanging as my fingers touched the floor. I can’t feel my legs but I know that I was moving them. It was hot; I can taste the dry air. Someone turned off my fan. Despite my aching legs I pushed myself to stand. Then, I saw it; given by someone who’s close to my heart. I picked it up and read the writings at the back. Then, I felt less sore. I had my smile and forgot my aching legs. Is this love? Because he makes the pain go away?

Hmmmm. When someone is so sweet to you, to the extent that he holds your hand and wraps his arms around your shoulder, is it his way of showing affection or is he just being normal around you?

Someone told me, that it’s either the guy is not being vocal with his feeling or he’s a flirt. I can’t risk my heart again. I can’t stand in front of him and ask him, “Do you like me?” I can’t risk what we have. (something that exists on my pretend world).

I’ll stop. I have too.

lyrics now are not well written.

most of the songs of our generation are consisted of SEX, ALCOHOL, BOOTY and SEX again.

example: kesha's song. tik tok :) haha, listen to it's lyrics :) "Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack" --> Jack is shortcut for JACK DANIELS, it's a whiskey available in America. hmmm, think about it. brushing your teeth in the morning using liquor. hmmm, isn't that stupid? hmmm. go watch the video of wong fu productions at youtube.

i'll look for other lyrics, with some faults.

good night PEOPLE :) love love LOVE ♥

GOOD NIGHT GUYS!

i had fun lashing out my thoughts. haha, having an online journal is really O-K-A-Y :)

i'll be back tomorrow for more!! sleeptight guys :) follow me ♥

love love :*

If only I could turn back time, I'll do it. I'll do it for sure

do you want a time machine? or a remote control that could pause, rewind, fast forward (bla bla bla). do you?

have you watched the movie click? the protagonist had a remote that could control things.
well, i want one. i have this urge to go back, back to something that needs to be repaired.

wishing to go back is probably the most common of all the common wishes. fro example, every one of us desired to fly, to be invisible and to time travel. yes, i want. i want to be a time traveler, sound's cool huh?

why do i want to travel? i want to make up for the mistakes i did. the kind of mistakes that stained my life. i love someone, something happened and that made my life miserable. because of my cowardliness and all of the bad traits in me, i lost him. i lost the guy i love. i gave him up, i gave him to someone that he didn't deserved. i had the best interests at heart, i love everything i have. i would give up anything just for him to say i love you too. but, i lost. i completely lost.

i need a remote control or a time machine, a time car or just teach me how to teleport through time and that will make me the happiest person alive.

but someone tapped me and said, what if this is your real path. that the one you wished to travel is for someone much more deserving and that it belonged to someone who needed it more than you do. well, i slapped hard. very very hard. it stinged and it left bruises that will heal in due time.

i want to stop wondering what if... and i wan to know what is.

where to begin, where to begin. paano ba ko magsisimula?

umpisahan natin sa,

DON'T EVER THINK IT WAS A MISTAKE TO CHOOSE TO FIND YOURSELF,
TO CHOOSE TO LOVE YOURSELF A LITTLE BIT MORE.

pwede rin na,

SAYING SORRY WON'T TAKE YOU ANYWHERE.

obviously, usaping pagibig nanaman. paborito naman nating lahat to eh. PAGIBIG.
ano ba ang pinagkaiba ng MAHAL kita sa INIIBIG kita, meron ba? pag may nagsabi sayo ng,
iniibig kita. babalikan mo ba siya? oo o hindi? sa tingin ko HINDI. bakit? parang ginusto mong kumain ng sinuka mo na. gets mo? mahirap ng bumalik pa...pagkatapos ng lahat ng nangyari. ilang buwan na ang lumipas, posible bang...MAHAL KA PARIN NIYA? kahit alam mong.. nagkaIBA na siya.

hindi ko na kayang ibalik yung dati, wag na nating ipilit ang di na dapat. masakit.mahirap.nakakasaka

l.
ngayon ko lang napagnilay-nilay na, i was sinking to the lowest of the low when i begged for his love. for our love. i was almost there but my strength was not enough. i did my part, and i won't do it again. nagmakaawa na ko. at binaliwala mo lang lahat. YOU CHOSE TO BREAK MY HEART.

turn ko na. ako naman. kung tinapon mo ko dati, malamang gagawain ko din yun. "HINDI MO ALAM KUNG GAANO KO KAGUSTONG SABIHIN SAYO NA, SANA TAYO NALANG, SANA TAYO NALANG ULIT. PERO PAG SA TUWING NARARAMDAMAN KO KUNG GAANO KITA KAMAHAL, HINDI KO MAIWASANG MARAMDAMAN ULIT LAHAT NG SAKIT. AND I'M SORRY."

gusto kong pagbigyan yung TAYO na hinihiling mo. pero nagkaron ng kayo, hindi na pwede yung tayo.
sabi nga nila, bakit mo pipiliin si number one, eh kaya ka nga nagkanumber two...kasi maspinili mo siya. mas mahal mo na siya. ano pa use ko? diba? tama na. ayoko na maging number two. ayoko ng maging third party. kahit sabihing mong TAYO? it feels that i'm the second woman, next to her. hindi mo na maaalis yung lansa na naiwan niya sayo, you smell like her, and that will stay forever. bakit ako magiging third party? kasi pag nahukay yung relasyon natin, relasyon niyo. di maiiwasan na naging panghuli ako. meaning, sumunod ako. kahit ako yung nauna. nandun parin yung naging kayo eh. nakuha mo ba?

hindi ko na kayang ibalik yung pagmamahal ko sayo.

iba na mahal ko. at mamahalin ko siya. gaya ng pagmamahal na ginusto kong ibigay sayo.
kahit hindi man kami humantong sa lebel na ninanais ko at least alam ko na, this time. walang other woman. it's just me. ME. no one else but me.